The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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