I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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