She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
