im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
