i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
