dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
