Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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