What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
