i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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