before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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