yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize