I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
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