i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
