my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
