is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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