Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
