This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
