her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
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