I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
