My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Be still, my beating vagina.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
