The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
