I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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