Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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