drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize
