Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
my god I love twenty year old dicks
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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