I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
