new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Randomize