I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
