i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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