I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
