lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
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