I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
