i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
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