Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
time to smoke my breakfast
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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