he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
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