The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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