Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
