Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Randomize
