Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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