i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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