Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
