Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
it hurts more in the daytime
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Randomize
