belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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