I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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