dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
