i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
