Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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