You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Enjoy the penises
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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