are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
