the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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