But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Randomize
